The Denial of Hope
by The Hooded Falcon
Summary: The Fellowship is due to leave Rivendell in a weeks time but is Legolas really leaving nothing behind him? Angst, Tears and Drama to get my creative muse flowing. Exert: "Composing himself, something had to be done and it had to be done quickly." Part One of the Angst Series. (Work being revised and continued now).
1. Chapter I: Hopeless, Her Undying Light

**Title: **The Denial of Hope

**Chapter:** One

**Chapter Name: **Without Hope, Her Undying Light

**Setting: **Just after the council and the deciding of the Fellowship. This takes place in the home and surrounding grounds of Rivendell (excuse my use of the common tongue).

**Chapter Rating:** T

**Rating: **M

**Words:** 1155

**Personal (OC) Character List:**

Esmerel

**Translations by the Grey Company:**

Naugrim: Dwarf

Elleth: She-Elf

**Disclaimer: **I do not own 'Lord of the Rings' by Tolkien nor any of the associated characters. I do, however, hold ownership and rights over any non-Tolkien characters, plots, settings and complications.

~ I do not own rights nor do I write for profit. My own enjoyment and passion drives me. I do not wish to cause any grief so please do not cause me any either.

**Important: **This is the first segment of a two part series of the newly revised work. The companion piece will be uploaded soon. Currently everything is undergoing adjustments and is being revamped.

**Constructive**** criticism and acknowledgement is welcome.**

Enjoy...

. . .

Rain fell from the sky in torrents causing water to streak heavily down the worn carved paths. A grey bleakness had settled on the surrounding forest and yet, in the rain and all its misery, shafts of light could be seen to stream down from between the clouds.

Ornamentally carved pillars rose to meet sleek marble roofs; entwined silver myrrh stretched out across valleys to from bridges. Below, the brook whispered its silent tune as it gurgled off into the distance.

Esmerel stood leaning against the balcony railing, distantly she gazed down upon the serine backdrop. From the room inside a figure stepped through the door; so very quiet was he that even her elven ears almost missed his sound. But alas, knowledge was the disadvantage of being an elf of the Moon. Beauty and grace is found to be easily acceptable, however, nothing can ever be kept from a Moon Elf, always to be revealed before its big opening.

Sighing softly she closed her eyes, "Gimli, what ails you my friend?"

Sometimes the escape she looked for could never be found in solitude.

"Nothing troubles me sweet lass. I believe though that there is a thought that may lay heavy on your mind." His shoulders stiffened as he approached her hunched form. No creature of perfection should bare the weight of such concerns.

"Can nothing ever get past this crude but concerned dwarf?" she thought.

"Ah, there you are my Romeo," she teased him, "Is there nothing that escapes your notice?"

Confused at the sudden change of mood, the Naugrim took step closer to her. However being around the Elven folk far too much for his liking, Gimli could almost always pick up when one was lying or speaking the truth.

For days she had not left her room, not a soul had seen her step outside after the council. "You are like a daughter to me. Tell me little one, what is it that has kept you locked away?"

Sobs started to wrack her body as tears rolled down Esmerel's pale cheeks. Her fingers unraveled themselves from the death grip on the railing. At the same time her knees gave way and she fell to the floor.

"Have you ever loved…" can her quiet voice. It quivered like a bowstrings releasing its arrow. Hands came up to cover her face.

"Well, you could say that I have…" he began, "There was once this young she-dwarf who…"

"No, not like that… Have you ever loved a being but cannot tell them? I watch him pass by without a word and my heart melts. Not a single glance in my direction and yet I crumble. I cannot live without him; and now I am being made to sail. Tell me Gimli, have you ever lost your courage to speak three simple words even when they lie upon the tip of your tongue? I am scared because I am about to lose even though I never even had him. This quest will be the death of you all… of him."

Her breath shook as she looked him in the eye. "When you go he shall leave my heart in tatters. If he were to die then I shall die to. My heart belongs to a man who doesn't even know of my name or of my existence."

Collapsing into the Master Dwarf's lap, the elf cried until unconsciousness claimed her. Carefully, Gimli moved the hair from her face. "I love a man who can never love me…" she whispered.

He watched her steady breathing and felt anger rise inside of him. Gimli knew of which elf she spoke of. An idiot, "Legolas, _Prince of Mirkwood_," he muttered, "You never even knew of the mistake you made in ignoring this young elleth."

It was a fact well known between Aragorn and Gimli that the blond elf had indeed fallen head over heels for the pale Esmerel. However, he had chosen to ignore her, ignorant of her very existence believing that his heart still belonged to him and not to her.

_"She is too young and beautiful, an elleth like that would never even glance in my direction, only my crown… I am a fool to think that I am anything to her."_ Legolas' words danced in his mind and Gimli sat stroking her raven hair. "And what a fool you are too young prince, what a fool you are too…" he muttered to himself.

Across the palace-like building, the very blond elf Esmerel and Gimli had been talking about only moments before sat in his room rocking back and forth. His assertion in joining the Fellowship had been a snap decision; one made in haste so as to attempt to block the pain of his heart. "If only you knew little one," Legolas whispered to himself.

"When I leave from here I shall be walking away from you and a part of my soul as well."

"After seeing you I could never love another, the way your eyes light up with laughter, you entrance me. I believe that I have lost my mind, heart and soul to you; and yet I cannot come to tell you of my affections… I shall lose you before I have even met you."

Grasping the sheets of the bed in which, tears began to trickle out from the corner of his eyes. "My love for you is eternal just is your caring ways. I watch the way you care for the hobbits and the dwarves; you are a pure soul. What am I to do…?"

For an age, Legolas continued to gaze at the ceiling – reminiscing.

Gimli had grown tired of watching the shadows dance across the floor some time ago. Even though it had been hours since the young elf had been carried to her bed, the dwarf had not left her side.

Both elves loved each other, he could even go as far to say that they were fated; however, neither knew of the others attentions. "_It is hopeless to love someone when you know that you shall never return to see their smiling face again."_ Those had been Legolas' same words uttered not even days before. Oh how wrong he was.

"Those two bloody creatures, I don't care how blind you are to each other; by the end of this week I shall vow to see you together." Gimli swore to himself, he could fight fields of legions of Orc's without fear, but two moping elves… This he could not deal with.

Aragorn hated to see suffering, and for two of his closest companions, feeling their pain was tearing him down. He knew what it was like to love someone who you could not have. "Stubborn, denying elves; I doubt that this will be the last I hear of them," he spoke to himself. Composing himself, something had to be done and it had to be done quickly.


	2. Chapter II: Distraught, His Fading Light

Denial of Without Hope – A commission for a reader

Chapter Two plus songs

Summary: Cloaked in her misery, Esmerel crouches on the ground, tears stream down her face. Shrouded in his guilt, Legolas holds himself tighter imagining it is her embrace and not his own. Watching in the distance, both Aragorn and Gimli decide that measure must be taken or both elves shall fade. Why is it that they stand apart? What decisions are keeping two souls for happiness? Something needed to be done, something needed to be done now.

Setting: Just after the coronation of Aragorn, as well as the entrance into the city with the elves procession. **There is another elf who is my character in this story. Please do not criticize her or any of my characters. She is Legolas's soul mate just as he is hers; however, they believe that they cannot be together because of the coming war. **

Character/s:

OC – Esmerel, mysterious elven princess, Legolas's soul mate

Legolas, Prince of Mirkwood and Jess's soul mate

Gimli, Master Dwarf and son of Gloin

Aragorn, Strider and Heir to the throne of Gondor, Arwen's soul mate

Arwen, Elevenstar and daughter of Lord Elrond, Aragon's soul mate

Lord Elrond, father of Arwen

Galadriel, the Lady of Light

Rating: T – M (maybe for later…)

Disclaimers for:

Tolkien – Lord of The Rings novels

Peter Jackson – Lord of The Rings movies

Adele – Set Fire to the Rain

Skillet – Looking For Angels

~ I do not own rights nor do I write for profit, my own enjoyment and passion drives me just as it motivates me to please others. I do not wish to cause any grief.

. . .

Chapter Two: Distraught, His Fading Light

Part Two

. . .

I let it fall, my heart

And as it fell, you rose to claim it

It was dark and I was over

Until you kissed my lips and you saved me

My hands, they're strong

But my knees were far too weak

To stand in your arms

Without falling to your feet

But there's a side to you that I never knew, never knew

All the things you'd say, they were never true, never true

And the games you play, you would always win, always win

But I set fire to the rain

Watched it pour as I touched your face

Let it burn while I cry

'Cause I heard it screaming out your name, your name

When laying with you

I could stay there, close my eyes

Feel you here, forever

You and me together, nothing is better

'Cause there's a side to you that I never knew, never knew

All the things you'd say, they were never true, never true

And the games you'd play, you would always win, always win

But I set fire to the rain

Watched it pour as I touched your face

Let it burn while I cried

'Cause I heard it screaming out your name, your name

I set fire to the rain

And I threw us into the flames

Where I felt somethin' die, 'cause I knew that

That was the last time, the last time

Sometimes I wake up by the door

Now that you've gone, must be waiting for you

Even now when it's already over

I can't help myself from looking for you

I set fire to the rain

Watched it pour as I touched your face

Let it burn while I cried

'Cause I heard it screaming out your name, your name

I set fire to the rain

And I threw us into the flames

Where I felt somethin' die

'Cause I knew that that was the last time, the last time, oh

Oh, no

Let it burn, oh

Let it burn

Let it burn

(Set Fire to the Rain – Adele)

. . .

Twenty days passed, the sky remained clouded and the ground a storm of tears; another twenty came and went again. Hope between them had all but vanished. Months, weeks, fortnights and minutes; they flashed forward into a whimsical blur.

The fellowship had faced many dangers, death at a certain extent and yet through all the hardships one had remained broken. Swept away by distress, his journey had been one of torment rather than adventure and forever an eternity it would seem to remain.

"To be ripped apart from your soul mate would be as if your very being would have been torn in two; a single part to go ahead whilst the remainder to stay behind." Lord Elrond spoke softly, his gaze on the slouched blond elf up ahead, "Legolas, young as though he may appear is but tangled… an empty shell of his self without her…"

Aragorn, the soon to be crowned king rode beside the elven lord, "There was nothing that could have been done. All those months ago, Gimli and I had thought that the rift could have been fixed; alas there was not enough time." Gimli grunted from somewhere nearby, it plagued him to think that there was nothing he could do. "Perhaps if we would have had another day or two..." Aragorn mused.

"Lord Elrond, what difference do you think it would make? He… we have survived wars, fought off the greatest of evil, aided by those we would have never even considered friends before and defeated Sauroman, Sauron and the armies of the darkness… you would think at least an emotion other than defeat and death would radiate from our once cheerful elf." Starting at a normal tone, the pre-kings voice ended in a whisper.

If one were to gaze around at that very moment, they would see festivities; music and dancing that flooded the street would draw the eye, but to draw the eye away from what? Ruins of once great buildings that had stood littered the cities edge; the stench of death whiffed slightly on the breeze, it was only to be chased away once again by the smell breads and cakes. Mountains of bodies and blood, the evidence of wars lay piled outside the city walls waiting to be burned.

But why would they focus on the negative when there is so much to feel joy about? The war of the ring had been won, the enemy defeated and light had been brought to the lands of Middle Earth once again. Many lives had been lost, yes, and whilst the elves would soon leave the shores forever, they had all come to see the crowning of a new king… the dawn of a new age.

Although the elves from Lord Elronds' realm had started to trickle in, the Lady of Light, Lady Galadriel and Lord Celeborn themselves and had yet to arrive. Elrond sighed; slowly he turned his head this way and that so as to gaze out over the moving elven procession into the city. The answer which he had vowed to forever remain a sad secret bubbled in this breath to quietly break past lips.

"Just like Elvenstar only slightly different, her fate was tied to that of fate of the ring, even Middle Earth itself. Although I cannot speak for her, I believe Esmerel may have ceased with the ring herself…" A pained expression played across both males' faces; unbeknownst to them, Legolas who had been riding slightly in front sat taller in the saddle, his elven ears ever listening.

"But she cannot have… she… she's too strong for that… tell me that this is not true?" begged Aragorn, turning slightly in his saddle. "It would kill him completely if this is true…"

"My son, I cannot be sure. Nothing is certain in these post war times…" Both leaders' mutterings were interrupted by the sound of hooves; the Mirkwood Prince was gone…

"What have we done?" The wind carried Aragorn's worried tone away.

. . .

"Just like Elvenstar…"

"Fate… Tied to ring…"

"Ceased with it…"

Dead

"Would kill completely…"

"Is true…"

Gone

Dead

"Be sure… Is certain…"

Dead, gone, ceased, unalive, dead… die…dead…dead…

She was gone… dead.

Dead.

Legolas' world seemed to stop, his only reason for living, for fighting, no matter how small it was had been destroyed. Dead. She was dead; he had failed her and this time there would be nothing to bring her back. .

This was how the two kings had found the young prince after the coronation, rocking back and forth. How was it that this scene seemed so familiar?

"…_before sat in his room rocking back and forth. His contemplation upon joining the fellowship had been a snap decision made in haste to attempt to block the pain of the heart. "If only you knew little one," Legalos whispered to himself._

"_When I leave from here I shall be walking away from you and part of my soul as well." Gazing softly towards the ceiling, he spoke gentle words conveying his sorrow. "After seeing you I could never love another, the way your eyes light up with laughter or gentle caress of your hands in your hair has entranced me. I believe that I have lost my mind, heart and soul to you and yet I cannot come to mutter my affections to another… I shall lose you before I have even met you."_

_Grasping the sheets of the bed in which the Mirkwood prince sat upon, tears began to trickle out of the corner of his eyes. "My love for you is eternal just is your caring ways. I watch the way you look after the hobbit and other elven folk, even the dwarves, you have no hatred. And yet, to see a sad look cross your features once in a while shatters me to pieces. What am I to do…?"_

_For an age, Legalos continued to gaze heavenward thinking and reminiscing. Seconds passed to become minutes just as they quickly turned into hours, and yet the Mirkwood prince continued to sit in silence."_

Elrond closed the door to Legolas's room once again; turning to Aragorn, his voice held remorse, "This whole war was an event that should have never happened. If only I had destroyed that ring all those years ago, none of this would have ever happened. It is not him who is the failure, I am. I am the one that is destroying him…"

"Never," Aragorn cut in sharply, "ever say things like that again! You have led your people through both suffering and happiness; do not think of the past for that cannot be altered. What has happened happened. Besides, this whole war would have still come around somehow; it is Legolas that needs us now."

"Would there be a small chance that 'she' may still be alive?" Both males refused to mention her name; it ignited a hope that would have been useless.

"For the sake of our dear friend, I hope she is… I dearly hope she is…" was Aragorn's reply.

. . .

Going through this life, looking for angels

People passing by, looking for angels

Walk this world alone

Try to stay on my feet

Sometimes crawl, fall but I stand up

'Cause I'm afraid to sleep

Open my eyes to a new day

With all new problems and all new pain

All the faces are filled with so much anger

Losing our dignity and hope from fear of danger

After all the wars, after settling the scores

At the break of dawn we will be deaf to the answers

There's so much bigotry, misunderstanding and fear

With eyes squinted and fists clinched we reach out for what is dear

We want it, we want, we want a reason to live

We're on a pilgrimage, a crusade for hope

'Cause in our hearts and minds and souls we know

We need it, we need, we need more than this

Going through this life, looking for angels

People passing by, looking for angels

Walking down the streets, looking for angels

Everyone I meet, looking for angels

So many nations with so many hungry people

So many homeless scrounging around for dirty needles

On the rise, teen suicide, when we will realize

We've been desensitized by the lies of the world

We're oppressed and impressed by the greedy

Whose hands squeeze the life out of the needy

When will we learn that wars, threats and regrets

Are the cause and effect of living in fear

Who can help protect the innocence of our children

Stolen on the Internet with images they can't forget

We want it we want, we want a reason to live

We represent a generation that wants to turn back a nation

To let love be our light and salvation

We need it, we need, we need more than this

Going through this life, looking for angels

People passing by, looking for angels

Walking down the streets, looking for angels

Everyone I meet, looking for angels

I became a savior to some kids, I'll never meet

Sent a check in the mail to buy them something to eat

What will you do to make a difference, to make a change?

What will you do to help someone along the way?

Just a touch, a smile as you turn the other cheek

Pray for your enemies, humble yourself, love's staring back at me

In the midst of the most painful faces

Angels show up in the strangest of places

Going through this life, looking for angels

People passing by, looking for angels

Walking down the streets, looking for angels

Everyone I meet, looking for angels

Going through this life, looking for angels

People passing by, looking for angels

Walking down the streets, looking for angels

Everyone I meet, looking for angels

Going through this life, looking for angels

People passing by, looking for angels

Walking down the streets, looking for angels

Everyone I meet, looking for angels

Going through this life, looking for angels

(Looking For Angels – Skillet)

. . .

Here it is, I am sorry for such a long wait… Do not kill me… please?


End file.
